Main Article: You Are Officially Called to Step Up Now
There are moments in my work as a coach where I experience someone's soul responding to their inner calling, like a flower blooming in the sunlight.
It's the moment where the discontent they feel in not living their true passion nudges them to risk all, to do whatever it takes to break free from their self-imposed prison. And then they step, nervous but confident, with their new-found purpose and vision in to their new way of living and being in the world.
It is glorious to see.
Like when 'Natasha' says, "I always wanted to dance professionally but never believed I had it in me to do so. Some early experiences with dance teachers left me crying and doubtful of my ability. Then I was too afraid to even try. I'm stuck in a business now that pays me well, but is not what makes me happy. I feel stuck and paralyzed. It's the root of my frustration and I don't want to live like this anymore. I want to change."
Natasha's pain is palpable. But so is her commitment to growth.
When you know in your bones you were destined to do something else because it fuels your passion, but you are on the wrong track, you can feel this gaping, yearning emptiness eating at you.
It's like you're torn in two directions, but stuck going nowhere.
I know, I've felt that too. For a long time I worked part-time before committing to my business. My energy was sucked sideways - one way to my employer, and then the other way by the calling that was growing louder and more insistent about my new passion as a coach, mentor, and teacher.
What keeps us stuck? What keeps Natasha from even trying to dance? What kept me from leaving the job and giving my business a go?
This is what my very-wise client Steph calls the 'but' muscle (yup - one 't'). 'But I'll be broke. But what if it doesn't work out? But what if they don't like my work? But what if people figure out I'm a fraud?'
And so on.
The 'but' muscle flexes every time you are called forth to step up and expand your sense of self.
It is the Subconscious You protecting you from change. And who has more control - the Subconscious or Conscious You? That's right - the Subconscious You.
Scientists estimate 95% of decisions are influenced by the Subconscious. Yikes!
To make matters worse, the Subconscious You only knows who you 'were'; not who you are growing into.
Until you teach it.
If you're going to relax your Subconscious 'but' muscle, you need to teach the Subconscious You who the new You is, and that it's ok to grow.
How to re-program your Subconscious:
1. First, satisfy the conscious mind by throwing all the logical arguments you can at the 'but' muscle.
For each 'but' ask "So? And so? And so what?" Keep drilling each response down until the 'but' muscle has nowhere to go.
For example, if the 'but' says, "But what if people don't like me", challenge it with "So?" So what indeed? Not everyone is going to like you. Besides, so what if they don't? Are you going to let it ruin your day? How do you really know they don't like you anyway? What if they actually
do like you, but you only imagined they don't? Do you want to hang out with people who don't like you? Who cares about them anyway?
You can get on a roll this way, arguing your way out of the 'but' resistance. It also gives room to gain determination and adopt a 'whatever it takes' attitude to bring your dream to fruition.
2. Release the energy of resistance. Chances are, even after the 'so what' challenge you will still feel that emotional tug of fear about your goal. This is where you get to do the funky stuff - because
fear is really just trapped energy.
Use a release method like PSYCH-K, EFT, forgiveness rituals, and so on to purge the fear.
With the fear gone, your inner handbrake is released; you will sail forward towards your goal.
Tip: You can learn these techniques and eighteen other release strategies in the
Three Pillars program.
3. Program your Subconscious with details of your new goal. Write this out: when you achieve your goal, what will you see yourself doing? What will you hear people saying to you? What will you be saying to yourself? How will you feel? Where do you feel that feeling in your body? What is the colour, shape, size, texture, temperature of that feeling?
This is goal setting with a major difference: it taps in to the cues that the Subconscious loves - visual, auditory, kinaesthetic. So this way the Subconscious You will know what to feel and how to respond when you think about your goal.
So instead of flexing the 'but' muscle, it will give you a kick in the butt to get moving.
Now you know! Let this be the moment that you heed your inner calling and step up to living an authentic, genuine, passion-filled life.
Yeah, baby, that's you I see groovin' to the beat of your own drum!